Assessing Things

Right now, at this season of life, Karoline is showing a lot of interest in my role as a pastor. It's an absolute joy for me. I don't know how long this will last, but I'm going to enjoy it while I can. Recently, she picked up my Bible, looked at all the tabs I have stuck in there, and asked what they meant, why they were colored the way they were, and how I prepare to teach each week.

She also was recently selected to the praise team at her school. The very first time she was scheduled to sing in their chapel service, I was scheduled to speak. Leading that service together was a GREAT daddy/daughter moment, and that only added to the interest in "what I do".

As she continued to reflect on me and my role, she spoke up the other night and said, "Daddy, as I think about it, I think you are the 5th most important person in our church. Pastor Matt is first, Mrs. Cheryl (our children's minister) is second, Mrs. Laura (our preschool minister) is third, and Mr. Mark (our student minister) is fourth. If it wasn't for them, there would be nobody at our church." Then she said, "Now that I think about it, you are probably behind that new college guy (Brad Lewter, who isn't even here yet) too."

Karoline is more than correct, and I'm thankful to even break the top 10. I appreciate the way she thinks, and I appreciate being part of a great team of people my kids look up to.

Listening and Responding in Marriage

A challenge and benefit of being a pastor is working with people who are struggling in their marriages. The challenge is that it is always hard...everybody hurts. However, the benefits are numerous. One benefit is that I am continually pushed into opportunities to glean from the process and hopefully respond positively in my own marriage.

Recently, I have been made keenly aware of the importance in listening and responding to our spouses. So much rides on doing both. To hear and not listen only devalues our spouse. It shows we don't care to really understand. To listen and understand and not respond devalues them more. It shows we don't care about them more than we care about ourselves. Over time, this lack of listening and responding results in a deficiency of real intimacy. Then, small problems consistently become big problems, the marriage reaches a crisis point, and the husband and wife wonder how they ever got there.

Trying to pay attention...

Struggling and Thankfulness

My son struggles a bit with spelling, yet he is great in math and other subjects. Michael tends to focus on the things he doesn't do well. At a recent parent/teacher conference, his teacher told me about her strategy with Michael. She lets him know two things. First, she is struggling for him. She wants him to know that she's "on his team". Secondly, she reminds him of the things he does well, encouraging him to be thankful for those things. She knows that those two things will help him battle against false thinking that he's "not good at anything" (words that come out of his mouth).

In one way, her strategy aligns with the apostle Paul's strategy with the Colossians. Wanting them to stick to Truth, and avoid false teaching, he lets them know (in Colossians 2:1-7) that he's struggling for them and that they should abound in thanksgiving. That helps. I pray that we will constantly struggle for each other and remind each other of how much we have to be thankful for.